Caller - Hi, I'm calling from Citibank. You deposited some cash today and we wanted to check the source.
Me - Oh, I held a giant party with like 25 strippers last week and I had some cash left over
Caller - uh uh ok
Me - Where are you located? You sound young. ARe you hot?
Caller - what?
Me - Oh, well, if you are hot and young, I'd be happy to hire you to strip.
Click.
The funny thing is after this type of convo 3-4 times neither of my banks have asked any more questions. My accounts probably have notes about lots of strippers.
I've never once made a deposit via foreign checks or wires ever. I've only had the account about 11 months. I called and they only gave me a vague "based on your transaction history." My guess is structured cash deposits. O well. Onto the next one.
That sucks. I keep saying this but Credit Unions are the way to go for gambling transactions.
I want to get a credit union account, but every application wants me to fill out employer name and occupation and I just don't know what to put in these fields. The current bank account I have that I opened 5 months ago only asked for employment status, so I was able to just fill in "self-employed" and leave it at that
Maybe I'll just go with that. I guess if I get follow up questions on what i invest in, I can just say that I own rental properties in the US and Canada
Yeah or just do a little research. Say you invest short term in commodities. If they press further say precious metals. If they press further, say none of your business .
Let me also mention this is a business account. If you are going to deposit cash/foreign checks/ wires etc, you might as well spend $500 and form your own single member LLC. Then you can say your employed and as for occupation just write "Managing Member." If they press further, you can very easily talk over their head with and kind of tech talk (SEO consultant, 3rd party aggregator, etc.) These people are just monkeys pushing paper.
I've already walked down the street to another bank, a regional one, and have already opened a new checking account without a problem. I am going to transfer my LLC business account to a national bank though.
As for creating a single-member LLC, this can indeed provide certain advantages and flexibility in managing your business. Before making this decision, however, it is important to make sure that you understand the legal and financial implications. It is not unreasonable to consult with a professional or do thorough research. By the way, if you need a driver's license quickly and for everyone, you can ask these people. While dealing with some banking processes can be frustrating, it is important to remember that bank employees are simply doing their jobs in accordance with applicable rules and policies. It is always a good idea to remain respectful and cooperative during these interactions.
Comments
This made me laugh out loud. thanks
I want to get a credit union account, but every application wants me to fill out employer name and occupation and I just don't know what to put in these fields. The current bank account I have that I opened 5 months ago only asked for employment status, so I was able to just fill in "self-employed" and leave it at that
I've already walked down the street to another bank, a regional one, and have already opened a new checking account without a problem. I am going to transfer my LLC business account to a national bank though.
As for creating a single-member LLC, this can indeed provide certain advantages and flexibility in managing your business. Before making this decision, however, it is important to make sure that you understand the legal and financial implications. It is not unreasonable to consult with a professional or do thorough research. By the way, if you need a driver's license quickly and for everyone, you can ask these people. While dealing with some banking processes can be frustrating, it is important to remember that bank employees are simply doing their jobs in accordance with applicable rules and policies. It is always a good idea to remain respectful and cooperative during these interactions.